One Day At A Time

Our baby is scheduled to enter this world and our lives on Dec. 23rd! He will be the best Christmas present in the entire world!

You have to give it to God! It is his plan and only he knows what is to come. You have to trust and believe in him.

Did I really see that!?!? On my way to work Thursday morning I pulled up to a red light and next to me was a woman in a car with a baby in the back seat. In her hand was a cigarette!!! Why don't people realize or listen to the warnings about the harmful effects of cigarettes and second hand smoke?

This morning I went to church and I left there humbled. Today was the start of a new series at church. It is titled "Bring the Love." Today's service was about bringing the love to the hungry. I walked away from church humbled because I learned more than just giving to the hungry, but learned about myself. I have been whining and complaining about not having children, not being able to have my own children, and not having money to adopt, among other complaints. Today made me realize that I need to stop complaining and stop being ungrateful because what I do have, many people do not. The pastor said a couple things that we wrote in our notes that I can apply not only to giving, but also to my life and having children. 1. God provides for His endeavors. 2. The size of your God is the size of your dreams. 3. God take the impossible and produces opportunities. What do I need to do? I need to refocus my life and put God at the center of it. I have been hopeless and negative about our financial situation and adopting. Probably because I haven't been Christ centered. As far as giving goes, I came home from church and cleaned out the cupboards. The hubby and I have more than what we need. Therefore, I am going to donate what we don't need. My church is taking a collection on Nov. 22, but I will be in Ohio that weekend. So, I'm going to take the box of food to school and give it to the guidance counselor and ask her pass it on to a family who may need it.

That's right, that's what one of my students said to me this week. And you can bet my response was, "Get out of my room right now. You do not talk to me like that. You can walk your butt up to the office right now!" Oh yeah! That's what I said. I have a few student who are very trying. Just last week I had a student walk away from me and out of the building when I was speaking to him (we were in the community, bowling.) And again, you can bet I didn't let him disrespect me like that. I followed his butt outside and let him have it! The sea of kids (maybe 20) who were waiting for the bus to come, spread. I think they were all shocked at my reaction. They of course didn't know what was going on, but new I was not happy. Work has been crazy. Right now I feel like my time and energy that I put into my classroom is unnoticed and unappreciated. The other day I said I was done. I'm done putting in extra energy and time, especially if people like my principal are going to complain about the length of my IEP meetings, but doesn't even notice all the extra time and effort I put into the meeting. BUT, where was I today when school was closed because of fog? You got it, in my classroom working. I know that some day one of my students will look back on their education and appreciate all that I've done for them. I know that God appreciates the time and effort I put into my classroom and students. I'm not a 7:25-3:15 teacher. It's more like 7:00 - 5, 6, 7, 8, and sometimes 9. I do the best that I can do to provide my students a good education and try to help them the best way I know how.

So, yeah..... What shall I blog about now? I ate an apple today! It tasted so good. It's been a while since I've eaten an apple. Holy cow!!! It was snowing this morning on my way to work. I say if it's going to snow, it needs to snow enough to delay or cancel snow. To bad the ground is still too warm. The para. who works in my room has been gone all week and let me tell you. I am so far behind on my grading. This really has mad me realize how much I appreciate her being there. I think I need to get her flowers and a card to welcome her back.

Worthless. Tonight the hubby said, "When it rains it pours!" and he wasn't kidding. We had a serious conversation. After our first financial news. The discussion was about us accepting the fact that we will not be able to adopt. Financially it is just not possible. If I knew then, what I know now, my life would be totally different. Between the two of us we have too much debt and no way can we afford to take on another loan or second mortgage. It's so hard to come to this realization especially when I've wanted to be a mom all of my life. My mom once told me that I had three goals in my life 1)be a teacher 2) get married and 3)be a mom. I have accomplished two of those three goals. I am so frustrated because there are people out there who don't even want to be mothers or want to be pregnant, getting pregnant and having kids. I want to be a mother and I have to pay thousands upon thousands of dollars to do that. I just can't do it. I see no possible way, especially if I want to get our from under the rock of debt I'm under already. UGH! Life sure isn't what I thought it was going to be.